I write stuff for kids...and muse on writing, children's books, and the publishing industry in general

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Take Your Main Character On A Date Blog Fest

I looked around the crowded restaurant, searching yet again for a glimpse of Verity's black-dyed hair. She would be wearing her favorite dress, lacy and flowing, with black velvet material and purple ribbons. My favorite as well.

My eyes searched over and over again. Anything to avoid looking at my watch on the table. It glared up at me, reminding me with every tick that Verity was late.

Tick. I can't stand this.

Tick. I've already waited an hour. Should I wait some more? Everyone's staring at me. Is that pity in their eyes?

I love her so much.

Maybe if I'd told her how I feel about her...


After another hour, I finally had to accept she wasn't coming. I beckoned the waiter and pushed my chair out from the table, trying not to take out my frustrations on the flimsy wood. It was then that I heard the murmur, travelling through the restaurant, gaining momentum as it pelted toward me.

"Did you hear?"

"What? What's happened?"

"Oh my God!"

"She's dead?"




I hovered, somewhere between sitting and standing, as my heart plummeted through my body and hit the ground with a smash. It was made of glass after all. So fragile. Shattered.

I knew, deep within every cell of my body, even before my mind understood the whispers. I would never see her again.

I could never tell her how much she meant to me.

"Verity." I whispered her name, not even sure whether anyone heard me.

Somehow, I managed to reach the street. I stood there, shoulders hunched, with no memory of how I'd made it through the restaurant. Had I crunched the pieces of my shattered heart as I walked?

A new round of whispers. No more, please.

It was the only thing people were talking about.

One word. Ringing in my ears. Getting louder and louder with each repetition. I couldn't shut it out. Couldn't stop it.

I jammed my hands over my ears. Squeezed my eyes tightly shut. But still the word found me, engraving itself deep into my brain. Screaming at me over and over again.


She was only seventeen. And I'd never even kissed her.


I've had so much fun writing this post. While not an actual excerpt from my manuscript FROM THE OTHER SIDE, it does give a little insight into Luke's feelings for Verity. Plus a tiny sneak peek into the plotline of my story (even if it does only touch about 1% of the surface!!!)

This blog fest was started over at Erica and Christy - great idea guys - so head over and check it out...


Michael Di Gesu said...

Great Rachel!
That was full of suspense with a good twist ending. I bet your novel will be terrific..

I really enjoyed reading. it. I posted mine on Erica's and Christy's I hope you had the chance to read my date with Jo March.


erica and christy said...

Poor Verity! Poor Luke!

I love the lines about his heart shattering like glass - it made mine drop, too! Thanks for posting!

erica and christy said...

I've read your synopsis and query, so I know the storyline some...I loved it! I loved Luke's perspective. I think once I read your full, I might just want to date him! Thanks so much for participating. I'm very glad you did! christy

Francine Howarth said...


Very touching scene, and nicely written with emotional input. Would so love to read more.

If interested you can find mine at my blog. The link to Fly on the wall post lies at bottom of first post. http://tgunwriter.blogspot.com.


N. R. Williams said...

Poor Luke and Verity...I have a death scene in my fantasy. But it is a friend, not a lover. Made me cry to write it.
N. R. Williams, fantasy author

Felicity Grace Terry said...

I saw you mentioned on Melissa's blog and as I love visiting other bloggerss I thought I'd stop by to say hello. Nice to have met you, I've enjoyed visiting.

Bast said...

It's interesting seeing this from a guy. Normally we have the girl waiting for some guy. This was really refreshing. And guys do wait and do feel that way. Well done!

Sharon K. Mayhew said...

Great writing exercise! What a fun blogfest activity! I really enjoyed your "date."

Rachael Harrie said...

Hi everyone, thanks heaps for your comments.

*waves at @Petty and @Sharon*) Thanks for dropping by, glad you enjoyed the story :)

@Gideon and @Francine - loved reading it both your blog fest posts :)

@Erica and Christy, thanks again for hosting the blog fest - had a ball writing my "date" piece above (though I guess I used a bit of creative license given the date never really happened, sorry about that, just couldn't help myself) :)

@Christy, I'd say you're in luck with Luke given Verity was murdered, but... you know she'd not really gone! ;)

@N.R. - you know what, I actually felt more for Luke in writing this scene than I did writing about the murder in my book. Perhaps it's a POV thing.

@Quinn - Thanks, it's great to get your take on Luke's POV. You know what, now I've written my piece, Luke's so much in my head I might even have to write a companion book from his POV so I can share his story as well...That will surely be an interesting project ;)

Anonymous said...

That was ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC! What more can I say. :O)))))

Tessa Quin said...

Rach! I have awarded you the Cherry on Top Award on my blog ^.^


Unknown said...

Thanks so much for joining me, loved the idea of your story. Carole.

Adina West said...

Love it Rach. The dinner that didn't even happen. Poor Luke...

Rachael Harrie said...

@Madeline, thanks so much! Really glad you liked it :)

@Tessa, SQUEEEEEE!!! (*grins widely at your award comments and wonders if she is blushing*)

@Carole, thanks for stopping by and commenting :)

@Adina, Ta muchly! I do feel sorry for Luke, just want to give him a big hug ;)

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